The thing that only eats hippies

... may actually be a green-eyed monster.

There I was, snickering gently at today's Cary Tennis feature in Salon ("The Gen X-ers Are Driving Me Crazy") with its adorable complaints ...

I work in a trendy Internet firm with people who are 15-25 years younger than I am. I love working with the younger 20-somethings, but I find myself increasingly frustrated with the Gen Xers -- those from 28 to 39. The stereotypes seem to be true: They're cynical, selfish, noncommittal, addicted to pop culture, oddly nostalgic, smart but not wise, suspicious of sentimentality but hypersensitive to criticism.

[...]

So, my co-workers drive me nuts, but it gets worse. My beloved Internet is filling up with blogs, columns and essays by Gen Xers who don't seem to have any framework for their arguments and who are militantly post-feminist (embrace your inner slut), post-hippie (I care only about my family -- fuck the community), post-vegan (I raise my own meat, slaughter it lovingly, then serve it up to my foodie friends).

... when some impish impulse took me to the letters pages.

Oh, the hilarity! Apparently those of us in that little demographic box are all prickly little cynics. No, really!

The one letter that finally sent me over the edge was this one:

[T]he anger-- diffuse, undifferentiated anger-- of the Gen-X generation seems to be such a major factor ... I am constantly struck at how angry so many are at people who are trying to help them. As a teacher, I sense this anger, and I think it's directed at "helpers" much more than "oppressors", hence the anti-union, anti-social program attitude while they embrace the CEO and marketers. Their skepticism is intense, but seems to be aimed at a paradoxically narrow population-- those who mean well.

(Emphasis mine.)

Wow, paternalistic much? I think the writer may have confused "skepticism" for "anger." Damn skippy I'm going to look at someone who tries to "help" me with a gimlet eye -- the writer has admitted that their "help" is wrapped up in their intentions, and who the hell are they to impose their agenda on me for my own good? At least CEOs and marketers don't pretend that anything they do is for my own good. And their agendas are usually a lot more transparent and easy to assess.

But wait -- that makes me cynical, doesn't it?

Once you strip away the acrimony, what stands out in many of the letters from people around my age is this sentiment: We don't see the need to consume like you do and we don't buy into the rules you set for work and recreation, O well-off ex-hippies. Why do you care? Get a life!

And that's the point the correspondent, Cary Tennis and most of the letter-writer miss: this intergenerational skirmish can be placed under the "Pretty white people with problems" category. Frankly, if the biggest concern you have in the workplace is the fact that nobody unquestioningly embraces your political opinions ... it's pretty sweet to be you.

And if you think the Internet isn't amenable to feminist, hippie vegan types ... learn to Google already.

Comments

[Rebecca]

I just went to a career counseling conference that had quiet a bit about generational issues in relation to work. Although the focus was more on "Generation NeXt" (Millenials, which I think I fall into, or at least right around the change from Gen X to whatever the heck the next generation is called), it was really disconcerting to hear all these Baby Boomer clucking knowingly about how Gen NeXt doesn't have it all together when it comes to work skills. What frustrated me most is that they bring up that this generation is unable to hold jobs, get married, and buy homes until later in life. Well, if you want us to work our way up with entry level jobs, it's difficult to get the money together to purchase a home!

Perhaps this isn't as related as I'd like it to be, but I have to say that I find Baby Boomers to be rather smug and somewhat dismissive to the problems of other generations. It doesn't seem that they want to look into why other feel differently than them. I understand that each generation feels their point of view is normal, but it does seem odd that the non-conformist and civilly active generation would be unwilling to attempt to bridge these differences.

(Although, Abby Miller of the Quarterlife Crisis was at the conference and she had some interesting info -- but not so great of a presentation.)

[Roger]

Damn right I'm cynical. Like both you and Rebecca point out, I'm immediately both suspicious of and cynical about anybody who instantly knows what all my problems are with a glance and want to "help" me by spouting all of their worldly wisdom at me. Holier-than-thou much? You have the whole thought nailed there already, Lisa.

That letter is just a hoot. Perhaps someone was looking in a mirror there? I dislike social programs but like marketers and CEOs? Excuse me? That doesn't sounds like X'ers... that sounds like the Republican party... You know, the older, boomer+ agers in power now?

Rebecca's post is really depressing. So boomers are disappointed that X'ers aren't all wild successes? Like they were in their time at this age? Let's also not consider falling real wages, and the favorite boomer entertainment of "downsizing" the companies they now run, making it harder to find the good jobs, and all but impossible to hold one over the long term - and retire with your retirement fund intact, if you even got one in the first place. Remember those boomers? Retirement funds and pensions? Yeah, we don't get those anymore. You were the last. You've taken ours away to make your companies look more profitable to your boomer shareholder buddies.

It still gets me. X'ers look up to CEO's? Remind me again... which was the generation that created "yuppies", the one who decided that sacrificing their families and lives in a never-ending search for the almighty dollar was a good idea? It sure wasn't X.

Ooo, this burns me up. I cannot abide hypocrisy.

[Polly]

You know, whenever some dumb Boomer wonders why Generation Xers are so darned angry, I feel obligated to point out that the very term "Generation X" was coined in the early 1990s AS AN INSULT. An insult, it should be noted, aimed at young people who could not find jobs because they graduated into a recession, and were therefore pegged by a certain older generation as lazy, worthless Xers (because X stands for NOTHING).

Roger, this may make you burst into flames, but don't forget the hypocrisy of former Free Love types complaining about the sluttiness of younger generations....

"It doesn't seem that they want to look into why other feel differently than them.... it does seem odd that the non-conformist and civilly active generation would be unwilling to attempt to bridge these differences."

Rebecca, I think that part of the self-image of the Baby Boomers (or at least these Baby Boomers) is the perception that they rule the roost. I think that's been kind of a constant with that generation, this notion that they are large and in charge, and everyone else is just going to be swept out of the way. The mores of the older generation were overthrown, and the mores of the younger generation--well, we're only as good as our willingness to suck up to them, right? It's not an attitude that lends itself to critical examination, and of course it slides very easily into smugness and self-indulgence.

[foo]

So, I read Coupland's Generation X years ago and I do not believe it was meant in any kind of derogatory manner or as an insult. Generation X meant that the generation was difficult to categorize. But, I dunno some may consider me angry and certainly skeptical...

[drunken monkey]

Coupland didn't originate the term; it's been around for decades (first used in 1964, apparently), and Cameron Crowe had an earlier description of so-called Generation Xers in Fast Times at Ridgemont High in the 1980s -- the first to experience Vietnam as nothing more than a unit in history class, the first to come of age with AIDS. Coupland popularized it (some would say reclaimed it). Also, I'd argue that the meaning of the phrase has changed a lot since Generation X was released; now I usually hear it used in a negative way -- as the slothy, self-absorbed evil wrought by the dot-com boom and bust of the 90s -- even by those who fall within its parameters.

I'm almost 25, so I guess that makes me Generation NeXt? How dorky. I wonder what the Boomers think of me.

[Lisa]

Oh, they loooooooooove the post-Xers, because they see them as idealistic and open-hearted and basically the polar opposite of us cynical, ironic, non-participatory Xers.

And may I say that assessment tends to baffle? It's not like an entire age group has opted out of using Usenet, Craigslist, social networks, MoveOn, building participatory technologies like Netscape, Flick, Blogger and Movable Type, or skipped Burning Man, or sat out big-assed festivals like Lillith Fair and Lollapalooza. My anecdotal observation has been that a lot of people in my cohort have created incredible communities and organizations centered around addressing specific social issues. Just because we're not all living together in some lentil-slurping commune while doing our thing doesn't make us a bunch of nonjoiners.

The more I think about that letter, the more I'm reminded of another ridiculously funny disillusioned-boomer article I read years ago in Utne Reader: the woman writing the article wanted to go work for a socially-responsible business in the Bay Area and she kept discovering that -- shocker! -- because these were businesses, they saw their first obligation as staying in business, and the social change as but another deliverable. In her worldview, they should have worked on changing the world, man, then taken their profits where they could get them. I wish I had kept the citation.

I bring this up because I think it illuminates one of the reasons people with that sort of stereotypical boomer mentality like to think of my cohort as soulless solopsists: because we tend to take completely different approaches to social change. Starting microloan programs instead of holding concerts for Bangladesh, for example.

[Polly]

"I read Coupland's Generation X years ago and I do not believe it was meant in any kind of derogatory manner"

"I'd argue that the meaning of the phrase has changed a lot since Generation X was released"

I've never read the book Generation X, and I probably should. But what I was reading when it came out was article after article about how lazy and unambitious we all were because we were college graduates working at Burger King. (I am 36, for the record.) That was a phenonmenon that was almost never presented as having any connection to the job market at the time. So Coupland may not have meant the term as an insult, but the way "Generation X" was popularly used even in the early 1990s was quite insulting--it meant you were a slacker.

"one of the reasons people with that sort of stereotypical boomer mentality like to think of my cohort as soulless solopsists: because we tend to take completely different approaches to social change."

I think the complaint about people being "post-hippie (I care only about my family -- fuck the community), post-vegan (I raise my own meat, slaughter it lovingly, then serve it up to my foodie friends)" kind of encapsulates that, Lisa. I mean, I look at that and think, If you aren't taking care of your family, your community's not going to be in such great shape, is it? And what's so wrong about the humane treatment and slaughter of livestock animals? Usually that's not an alternative to veganism, it's an alternative to the non-humane treatment and slaughter of livestock animals. But I freely admit that I really distrust the hazy, purist approaches, because as far as I can see, they usually are aimed at giving adherents cause to pat themselves on the back, rather than actually making anything better.

[drunken monkey]

I like your microloan vs. concert (does this mean the Beastie Boys are boomers? Horrors!) comparison. I think Generation X is still interested in social concerns; after all, who are the bobos buying all that organic stuff at Whole Foods? Not me; I can't afford it.

The Boomers were idealistic, and it was very of-the-times, but we now know how that turned out. I see a focus on getting results with activism now, whether it's with Bill Gates' business-like approach to funding research for diseases that ravage the developing world or a newsletter like Daily Bite, which makes greener living seem groovy and realistic. When it works, it's a nice marriage between the ideals of the '60s and the capitalism of the '80s, I think; a focus on results is not necessarily a bad or pessimistic thing.

That's kind of you to say that my generation is seen as open-hearted and optimistic, Lisa. Most media representation of people my age makes us look like a bunch of babies who have been coddled by our (Boomer) parents, have astronomical expectations of the results we'll get without doing any work and can't handle the real world without Mom and Dad holding our hands. If the Times is to be believed, all NeXters are getting $1000 a month from their parents because they just can't handle a drop in their standard of living after they move away from home. Most of the twenty-somethings I know are dealing with student debt and finding a job, so it's frustrating to see that portrayal over and over.

[Account Deleted]

I'm also of the post-Gen X crowd (I often hear us described as Generation Y) and I agree with drunken monkey's assessment of the media representation. It's typified, I think, by the alarmist stories of helicopter parents who can't stand to see their children struggle. I'm not sure how much truth there is in that. I'd venture that it's just too early to see how my generation will shake out-- the oldest of us are just settling into our first jobs, while the youngest are still learning to read.

I'm not sure that I agree that the Boomers love us post-Gen X'ers. Certainly, they treat us better than Gen X. But we're their children, by and large, and I think the primary motivator there is guilt. They feel responsible for us-- if we're clingy and coddled, it's because they micromanaged our lives with ballet lessons and indulged our childish whims with fancy clothes and video games. We grew up in the heady bull market of the '90s, but now the Boomers worry that they're leaving the world a bit worse off than they found it. They feel bad, and I think it shows in their treatment of us in the media.

My father (born 1944) is actually not a Boomer; he snuck in on the tail end of the Silent Generation. I was fascinated by this as a child. My mother, ten years younger, described the '60s in terms of what she saw on TV as a kid-- the moon landing, JFK, and Martin Luther King. My dad's stories were about music festivals, protest marches, and his years in the Navy. My mom confessed to me once that she felt her whole generation was just faking it. If the news stories are correct, Generation Y has picked up on that insecurity and figured out exactly how to exploit it.

[Roger]

Polly - yes, that just might make me burst into flames. (Insert background music of Incubus' "Pardon Me" here.) I haven't quite forgotten that, actually. Whatever the sin is, the boomer generation committed it themselves, but now wants to look down their noses at everyone else about. Shoot, those "sins" are just part of growing up. Every generation goes throught them.

To your point about the boomer self-image... I think that image is, while not justified, at least somewhat understandable. In the boomers we have the largest single generation the world has ever seen, and for decades corporate America - especially the retail sector - have fallen all over themselves to cater to that crowd. So in a sense we created our own monster by giving them whatever they wanted at every stage of life. Is it any wonder they can't understand why the younger generations find it so hard to make their mark?

What I find particularly telling is that we now have post-retirement boomers and older working at Burger King. How delightlyfully ironic!

I like your take on the issue, Polly. (As I do everyone else's so far, for that matter.)

[marion]

"Roger, this may make you burst into flames, but don't forget the hypocrisy of former Free Love types complaining about the sluttiness of younger generations...."

But Polly, you see, they were practicing Free Love to shatter the patriarchy and fight The Man. We're not doing it to rebel - we're doing it because we can. It doesn't MEAN anything. Therefore it's "slutty."

My totally unscientific suspicion? A lot of Free Love consisted of pretty bad sex that the women involved had because they thought it made them Cool and that was followed up by various STDs that were uncomfortable to have or to treat. Whereas the "slutty" behavior today is more likely to involve good sex and more likely to be safe. Yes, I know I'm not talking about all of society, but I do think that this generalization applies to the types of people who fight about such things. So what you really have is bitter people who can't stand the idea that some 20something is having fun with sex.

Why yes, I AM a terrible, warped person, why do you ask?

[Jecca]

Gee, I wonder why watching Boomers' hypocrisy as they morphed from hippies to yuppies might have made us Gen Xers cynical? And why the next generation that was more removed from this might be more "idealistic"? 'Tis a puzzlement!

[Roger]

Hehe, on the nose, Jecca, on the nose. :)

[Shotrock]

There was a feature article on Barack Obama last month in New York magazine. I was struck by something he said:

“To some degree—and I say this fairly explicitly in my book—we have seen the psychodrama of the baby-boom generation play out over the last 40 years,” says Obama as we’re driving through ravishing acres of corn and soy. “When you watch Clinton versus Gingrich or Gore versus Bush or Kerry versus Bush, you feel like these are fights that were taking place back in dorm rooms in the sixties. Vietnam, civil rights, the sexual revolution, the role of government—all that stuff has just been playing itself out, and I think people sort of feel like, Okay, let’s not re-litigate the sixties 40 years later.”

And I realized, hell yeah, Barack's right. For the past 15 years, it's been nothing but: Did you inhale? Did you go to Oxford to avoid the draft? Did you get married to avoid the draft? What really happened on the Swift boat? Tell us again about the Hanoi Hilton! Why didn't you show up for your national guard training? OH FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST SHUT UP.

I mean really, how can one expect our political representatives to solve looming disasters like Social Security and global warming when they're all still fighting about What I Did During My Summer of '67? We've wasted so much time on this history - and Boomers, that's what it is now, HISTORY - that we've put ourselves and our country behind the 8-ball in so many ways.

I'm so glad that people of our generation are getting involved now - whether they're Democrat like Obama or a Republican like Tom Kean here in New Jersey - simply because the Woodstock vs. Mekong issue doesn't apply. Which means, hopefully, we'll get some focus on *actual* issues.

[Trish]

I think it's the hippie generation who are full of complaints. Out of control druggies that are now too old and the only thing hip about them is a hip replacement.You proudly tooted about being against the establishment then you gladly became The Machine itself giving us the greedy 80's. You watch the younger generations with such contempt and envy.You were all just a bunch of wasted immature over coddled weaklings who wanted to play at acting grown up.You even bought into your own hype. You thought your summer would never end, but it did so deal with it. Every one grows old and dies.
You passed us a world corrupted with your drugs,addiction, free love,disease and your twisted brand of freedom. Thanx for the lousy inheritance. Now you call us lazy and expect to clean up your mess?
Can't wait to bury you people.

[Trish]

I think it's the hippie generation who are full of complaints. Out of control druggies that are now too old and the only thing hip about them is a hip replacement.You proudly tooted about being against the establishment then you gladly became The Machine itself giving us the greedy 80's. You watch the younger generations with such contempt and envy.You were all just a bunch of wasted immature over coddled weaklings who wanted to play at acting grown up.You even bought into your own hype. You thought your summer would never end, but it did so deal with it. Every one grows old and dies.
You passed us a world corrupted with your drugs,addiction, free love,disease and your twisted brand of freedom. Thanx for the lousy inheritance. Now you call us lazy and expect us to clean up your mess?
Can't wait to bury you people.